Hurt 2

Sorry for the short post;*

Previously on Hurt...
We spent the last 2 weeks together then he left to Kuwait, and brought back his bride 2 weeks after…

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2 years passed

3abdullah, 7essa (his wife), and I shared each day together. 7essa was open minded; I let her in to my life as she let me into her life. She knew about me and 3abdullah's past. When he fist told her about me all she said was, "we can all be friends right?" at that moment he fell in love with her, her open mind, her bubbly personality, her fun spirit.
She gave us our space. But shockingly the more space she gave us the less we felt towards each other and the more I was happy for them. She was beautiful, with her long black hair and her dark skin and light eyes. She was tall with a curvy body which she knew how to style. 7essa and I grew so close to each other! We hung out alone all the time, we went shopping, we had our girl bonds together. Every time she had problems with 3abdullah I helped her get through them, and talked to 3abdullah for her.

February 3rd

Incoming call

7essa: 7ayatiii!!

Me: hey sweety! How are you?

7essa: fine! Come over tonight! For dinner

Me: hehe ok at what time?

7essa: 7

Me: I'll be there

I was there with jeans and a simple white top, I didn’t like over dressing if Abdullah was there so no memories came back. We were all happy this way.

3abdullah opened the door welcoming me in with a big hug and we went into their living room. Sat on the couch. He had this spark in his eye, an unusual spark.

Tammy: 3abood what's wrong?

3abdullah: I want 7essa to tell you!!

Tammy: wainha?

3abdullah: 7ESSSAA!!! (he called out)

7essa: kani kani, baby wait.

Tammy: 7esso yalla!!

7essa: hehe kani kani.

7essa went and sat on 3abdullah's lap.

Tammy: so spill you two!

7essa: this is a present for you

7essa handed me a little box. I opened it to find a baby shoe.

3abdullah: turn the shoe! (They both giggled)

I turned the shoe wela katbeenlii:

To aunty Tammy, mommy is two months pregnant with me, and if I'm a girl my name is going to be Tammy too, please love me, congratulations xoxo

I looked up to find them both smiling, my heart ached, I know that we supposedly moved on, but I always wondered what if we ended up together, what if?

I hugged them both tearing from hurt!

3abdulla: shfeeech ya m3awda laish tabcheen?!

7essa: enta shtabe! They are tears of joy!

Tammy: yea hehe (I can't breathe!)

We ate dinner and I excused myself earlier than usual, and went to my apartment, which was still in front of theirs. And silently cried myself to sleep. I cried for me, for what I have become, I cried for the empty bed I was sleeping in all alone, I cried for the several times dist 3ala nafse for a guy. I cried for me.